


we laugh until our ribs get tough

by theredvipers



Series: ribs [2]
Category: Papillon (2018)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pacific Rim Fusion, M/M, idiot jaeger pilots in love but they won't say it yet, is it considered slowburn ? let's call it slowburn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2019-05-29
Packaged: 2020-03-26 15:29:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19008625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theredvipers/pseuds/theredvipers
Summary: The aftermath of the Breach.





	we laugh until our ribs get tough

**Author's Note:**

> couldn't help myself.  
> i do not recognize the existence of pacific rim: uprising, as much as i love john boyega, but i AM kinda borrowing from that plotline so who can never be sure.

Papi didn’t know how long he’d spent in the med bay. He woke to the lights dimmed, inside one of the healing pods. The medics had told him that most of the Kaiju Blue had been washed off and he would have little to worry about, but they still kept him and Dega under observation, and would for a couple of days until they were truly clear of danger.

He turned to his left, and found Dega, sleeping. He looked younger, that way, like he could have been one of Papi’s old Academy classmates. He looked tired, too, and Papi didn’t blame him. It had been his first–and probably, thankfully, last–battle, but it had been a trying one. They hadn’t been sure if they’d make it out alive.

Papi had not hesitated before he had given his air supply to Dega. He’d wanted him to live. Dega had a lot to look forward to, deserved to see the world he had worked so hard to save, and Papi had assumed it would be fitting for him to meet his end at the hands of Kaiju, doing one last good thing.

He still didn’t know how he’d made it to the surface.

What mattered now, he supposed, was that they’d both survived. Now they had to rebuild their lives, after this war, and after The Breach.

He watched as Dega awoke, blinking away the remnants of sleep. He seemed to be disoriented, the way Papi had been when he’d woken up the first time. That’s what the pain killers did to you. Then, Dega blinked a couple more times, before he seemed to notice Papi’s gaze on him, and turned around.

“Hey,” he whispered, voice hoarse. His throat was probably as dry as Papi’s had been.

“Sleeping beauty wakes.” Papi teased, then pointed to Dega. “Water on your left.”

Dega did not hesitate before he got up as much as he could, and downed the glass of water in one big gulp. Sighing, he turned to Papi. “What you did was stupid.”

“All heroics are.” Papi replied, and then put his hand on the glass. Dega mimicked the movement. Papi guessed it was part Ghost Drift, part genuine sentiment. “I wasn’t going to let you die. I dragged you into it.”

And he would get Dega out. He had promised himself. Dega didn’t know that, though, and looked like he’d give Papi a much more stern talking-to once they left the med bay. “I chose to go. Not some bright-eyed rookie anymore, remember?”

Papi recognized the phrasing. He _had_ thought of Dega as some rookie who was too busy pretending to be a big damn hero, but that was no longer true. He’d seen inside Dega’s mind, felt him in the Drift. Dega was a complicated person, as most were, but he was a good, brave man who’d given Papi a chance when he didn’t have to. He knew Dega felt similarly about Papi, especially after their first failed Drift attempt.

Still, he had no other reason for Dega. “I wasn’t going to let you die.” He repeated. Dega took his hand off the pod’s glass, and lied back down. Papi watched him, noting he didn’t look like he was in pain. Most of their wounds were superficial, but Papi had sustained a pretty big cut on his leg. Nothing that the pod wouldn’t take care of, but it hurt like a bitch. He was glad Dega was not hurt.

“Where will you go now?” Dega asked. The implication that he was afraid Papi would take another wrong step that would land him in prison was there.

“Don’t know.” Papi admitted. He hadn’t given it much thought. There would be time for that. They had time, now, and a whole lot of world to see.

“Hmm.” Dega said. “Me neither.”

Papi looked at him again. Even tired, beaten down by battle, and in the middle of the med bay, he thought Dega was beautiful. He had thought so since they had first met, but now, with the man at his side, and both of them safe, that fact was something he could not deny.

He drifted off thinking of the way Dega had curled a hand around his own after they’d closed the Breach.

-

The remnants of the Drift always made pilots hesitant to leave each other’s side, especially after high stress situations. Papi might have known Dega for little, but it was hard for him to shake off the feeling that something would happen if they were not together, so Dega agreed to sharing a room without much fuss. At least until they figured out what the next step would be.

“You’re very annoying.” Dega said, as Papi practically shepherded them into a room with a bunk bed, and then proceeded to claim the top bunk for himself.

“Right back at you.” Papi laid on the bed, and closed his eyes. What was left to do was clean up, and repurposing Jaegers. Some kind of peace agreement would have to be reached, between world leaders, to decide what would become of the remaining Jaegers and what they would be used for. The Kaiju threat was over, for now, and they didn’t know if there would ever be a similar threat. They had to be prepared.

Papi knew that he and Dega could also choose military careers. They’d stopped the apocalypse, and closed the Breach. They’d rise through ranks fast and the pay would be comfortable enough they could afford to retire early. But Papi knew neither of them really wished that. It would feel too much like being trapped in a system they had never had much love for.

He heard Dega rustling around the room, and opened his eyes to find Dega putting on a coat. “You going out?”

“Celier.” Dega offered as explanation. Celier had not told anyone, but Kaiju Blue was wasting him away, and getting inside a Jaeger in order to help Nenette after Julot had been injured, well, that had been the literal nail on the coffin. The doctors couldn’t say how long Celier had, but the illness was rapidly developing, and he didn’t look well. Dega held the man in high esteem, and Papi knew he wanted to see him before Celier would begin hallucinating, until his body shot down.

Kaiju Blue was an ugly thing. Papi almost shuddered. “I’ll go with you.”

Dega didn’t oppose, but he protested on their way there, “You do know this... desire for proximity is one of the side effects of the Drift, right?”

“Kinda offended you don’t want me around.” Papi said. “I also should go… say goodbye.”

He had never cared much for Celier as a person, but the man had also made sacrifices for the war, a war effort that had also tossed him aside. The least Papi could do is see him off.

Dega bought it because it was half true. “Alright then.”

The trip to the med bay was brief. Papi opted to just thank Celier for bringing him back to the Shatterdome, and he left Dega and Celier alone.

Dega didn’t look any worse for wear once he had finished talking to Celier. “That man is a real pain in the ass, like _someone_ I know.” Dega said. “But he’s been there. He could have said no when I decided to try and pilot again, but he didn’t.”

Papi didn’t hesitate before he dragged Dega into a hug. Their height difference was significant enough he could feel Dega slightly get on his tiptoes. “I’m sorry.”

Dega returned the hug. “Me too.”

When they drifted apart, Papi offered a smile. Dega returned it. “Makes you think.” He said.

“Yes,” Dega agreed. “The apocalypse is over, but our time on Earth is still a fleeting thing.”

“Gotta make the most of it.” Papi continued. “And I think that bastard made the most out of his.”

That made Dega chuckle. “So,” Papi said. “You thinking of becoming a Marshal any time soon?”

Dega shrugged. “Wouldn’t really suit me. I was an engineer until you came along.”

Whatever was going through Dega’s head, Papi couldn’t tell. They made the rest of the way to the dorms in silence.

-

Once the doctors had assured them both that they didn’t have to worry about Kaiju Blue, Papi’d had time to think about what would be next. He still had some money, and as a PPDC veteran, he would be entitled to a pension. With that, he could travel around the world, and then he would decide when to settle down. One step at a time.

He hadn’t realized Dega was part of his plans until he’d been faced with the reality that Dega had plans of his own. And those plans most likely didn’t include Papi.

Dega said nothing, and went about his day as if the Shatterdome still were functional. Negotiations were still ongoing, but it all seemed to point towards repurposing Jaegers to become first response emergency units, security for world leaders meetings, cleaning units for areas affected by Kaiju Blue, and patrols for certain parts of the Pacific Ocean. Dega had helped figure all of that out, so despite his insistence he did not want to become a Marshal, he seemed to still think it was his duty to help rebuild the world after Kaiju.

One night, Papi breached the subject. “Dega,” he said softly. Dega was reading some reports about the agreements concerning Jaegers and their pilots. “What will you do once this is all over?”

Dega took a second to reply. “Help rebuild, I suppose.” There were still entire cities that were barely fit for living after the Kaiju had gone through them. Orphans and widows that needed help. A lot to do, and not enough people to do it. The PPDC numbers were almost in the red, now. Another plan was to reinstate the Academy with a limited number of cadets, and train them to become pilots, even if they were no longer needed on active duty. “I’ve been offered a position at the Academy.”

“Will you take it?”

Dega did not reply, and instead said, “They asked if you would be interested in one, too. Told them that was up to you.”

Papi contemplated it. He’d been a good student, but he could not see himself training future generations for the PPDC. “Don’t think I’m fit for that.”

“And you?” Dega asked. “What will you do now?”

“Go see the world we saved.” Papi said. “We have time now.”

“That we do.” Dega said.

Papi did not bring it up again.

-

When the time came, the Hong Kong Shatterdome became fully operational, ready to receive the first post-Breach batch of cadets. Dega had actually taken to his duties, despite his own doubts. Nenette had also successfully recovered and she was the now the Marshal in charge of the Shatterdome, at the insistence of Dega, who had argue the post was to go to a senior pilot like her.

Papi knew that all meant it was almost his time to make himself scarce, and go out and look for his life after the Breach.

Dega never brought it up, never pressured him or reminded him of what Papi had told him. He simply kept going like they were still fresh out of the Atlantic Breach war. Except his routine was widely different now; he got up very early in the morning, and then he went back to their shared room very late at night. Papi could not remember the last conversation they’d had, but all in all, it was nice. Nice to see how everyone slowly moved on.

Not so nice to see how he would not fit in the world of the Shatterdome again. Nenette herself had said there would always be a place for him in the PPDC, but for now, Papi was truly done with the life of a Jaeger pilot.

They’d won. The war was over. The world was heading towards a slow, steady rebuilding. He had to look for his own way of rebuilding now.

He waited up for Dega, who did not look surprised to find him awake. Papi did not want to wait, and cut to the point, “I’m leaving soon.”

Dega nodded, “Well. Whatever you need…” Dega sighed. “The PPDC will always be here for you.”

Papi nodded, understood it for the dismissal it was. They’d piloted a Jaeger together once. That did not make them friends. But it was still strange, that he’d kind of.

Well.

He had kind of wanted that Dega ask him to stay. Help rebuild. Do anything.

“You should come with me.” He said, before he could think about it.

Dega considered it, and shook his head. “I… I think I need to stay.” Dega said. “It’s something to do. Something good.” He smiled softly. “Maybe I don’t belong here, but… it’s okay. It’s good. I can help, and I will help.” Dega explained. “I think…”

“What?” Papi demanded.

Dega shrugged. “Nothing. I’m just glad that you know what you want to do.”

His sleep was uneventful, but restless. The next morning, as he was about to leave the room, Dega followed him.

“Don’t you have things to do?” Papi said. “Now that you’re–” he waved his hand in the air. He didn’t know the specifics of Dega’s post, only that he would now train the new cadets.

“Program Director, they call it.” Dega offered. “Part trainer, part babysitter. Things will be slow until the cadets arrive, so.” Dega shrugged. “You _didn’t_ think I wouldn’t see you off.”

Papi shrugged. “You’re a busy man now.”

Dega hummed. “There is someone who can take you to wherever you need to go. There’s cash and supplies ready.” He said once they were out of the Shatterdome, and at its main entrance.

Before Papi could deny them, Dega raised his hand. “You’re PPDC. We take care of our own.” Dega said solemnly. “And you helped save the world. The least we can do is to ease your transition into civilian life.”

Papi wondered if the war was truly over for the both of them. “Thank you.” They stopped, and he took Dega in, in his Ranger uniform. The standard army green one, with the insignia that identified him as one of the PPDC’s Rangers. He looked very professional, but like a man that was ready for another war. Papi knew it would take them both a bit before they stopped thinking of themselves as soldiers. Maybe Dega never would, and that he could not understand.

“The war is over.” Papi said, looking at Dega. “Even if you–”

“I told you that it’s good.” Dega replied. He looked like he meant it. “It’s what I can do. What I have to do.”

What Dega was seeking atonement for, Papi didn’t know. Maybe he felt as though he could have done something sooner, before the Breach. Maybe he still carried the weight of their first failed Drift, of the fall of Cherno Alpha, of Papi’s almost-death, of Celier’s sickness, on his shoulders. But he was a man with a purpose. Papi would not take that from him.

At a loss for words, he pulled Dega into a hug. He felt like they were back at the sea, after the Breach, clinging onto Dega like a lifeboat. He closed his eyes, felt childish for being attached to a man that he’d not known for long, but that still knew him better than most.

“Take care of yourself, man.” Papi said when they broke apart, keeping his hand on Dega’s shoulder. Dega nodded, smiling, and Papi squeezed his shoulder before he let go.

“You too.” Dega said. “You’ll always have a place here, if you like, Papi.”

Papi knew he meant it because he was also part of the PPDC, but he smiled. “Goodbye, Dega.”

“It’s Louis.” Dega said, but he was already walking away. “You should call me Louis.”

Papi waved at him. Dega waved back. He didn’t look back to take the Shatterdome in one last time. Something told him that this would not be the last time they’d see each other.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!


End file.
